PACHUCO EDUCATED

By El Pachuco Educado, Kathy Julio.

Dear Pachuco,

I am a young Latina woman and I am dating a mature, well-educated man. The truth is that I am not one who likes the chavalitos (young boys). I enjoy being with more mature men because they know how to treat a lady. There are some older women that I know who are putting me down for my decision. Well … they are actually gossiping about me. Why do these women feel that it is their job to tell me who to date? What is your opinion, Pachuco?

Being Gossiped About

Dear Being Gossiped About,
It looks like someone taught you how to fish :) At the same time, it seems that you have an infestation of cucarachas chismosas (gossiping cockroaches) whispering about the fish you caught. May I suggest getting an exterminator?
Homegirl, let me break it down for you this way. It is not uncommon to find these types of people, both men and women, roaming around the workplace, the gym, or even churches talking about and criticizing people in general. El chisme (gossip) is the addiction that keeps resentful people “alive” each and every day. What a waste of time and energy.
If there is one thing that really gets the Pachuco’s veins bursting, son los chismosos (it is the gossipers).  This includes people who gossip and people who listen to gossip. The way I look at it is that if you disrespect people behind their backs while getting some kind of satisfaction from this, then down deep you must feel “less than.” That’s because gossip is about putting down and even betraying people as a way to boost yourself up. All done as a form of entertainment!
There are several reasons why people gossip. Estas viejas (These old women) could be gossiping out of jealously or envy. This envy could stem from you having something they want to have. Maybe it’s your looks, your youth, or even your big fish. Funny thing is that if you were to ask estas viejas if they would date a younger man if they had the chance, I bet they would say yes!
Why is it that people are uncomfortable about intimacy when you have an age difference? What gives people the right to disapprove? Who are we to judge? If two people want to be together and they feel comfortable in their relationship with each other, let them be. My advice, mija (my child), is never mind las chismosas. They will always find someone and something to talk about.
I was at an event some time ago when a woman approached me and asked, “Is that your daughter?” The thing was that I was very familiar with this woman as being quite the gossiper. Yes, I was with someone much younger. But this was between my date and me. Without saying a word, I turned around and passionately kissed my date. Then I turned back to the woman and asked, “Would I kiss my daughter like that?” La vieja chismosa turned red as a tomato. I then said to her, “Congratulations on your pregnancy.” She looked at me very surprised and said, “I am not pregnant.” I smiled and walked away with my date. I guess I know how to give people some of their own medicine. The moral of this story is just to be respectful. And if you can’t, keep your questions and your comments to yourself. You may get back what you give. And trust me, that is not a good feeling.
The Pachuco Educado.